In-vitro qualifies for interest free loan? When other people go into medical debt for severe injuries this is what qualifies for a loan? You lost me there for good. Having a baby is a choice not a necessity in life.. get a grip David and go see the real world.. spend a week with disabled vets in the poconos where most young people are on drugs and can not afford care or food…
Each organization that does good has its own set of mission priorities. The surest way of ruining any organization is trying to be all things to all people.
The in vitro loan did not deprive disabled army vets in the Poconos of anything. And the loan was repaid to help another borrower with another need. People who can’t afford in vitro is definitely part of ”the real world.”
I have the strong feeling (based on David's piece and a quick look at their website) HFLS would extend - and has extended - interest free loans to those in need of help with a serious emergent medical expense, as well as a family in need of support for IVF.
I am on the Board of Hebrew Free Loan in San Diego and our single donation to the organization has been recycled almost 200% helping students complete all levels of education, fertility, emergency medical and rent support - in these times it gives a hand up and not a hand out! Borrowers also receive a financial advisor to provide future stability. The NY org has provided millions of dollars of support - and in the fertility arena, we helped a same sex couple who experienced bias when trying to secure financial assistance. Agree - it is a source of positivity in the dark clouds of our world…
Great story, David. It’s no secret that the news skews to the negative, feeding our primitive brain’s appetite for danger and fear. I have long believed that if we heard in equal measure about all the good things going on, a tipping point toward positive change would happen sooner (and toss in evolution to higher consciousness while we’re at it). I met a woman years ago who started a site called the Good News Network (GNN). 20 years on, she’s still at it. Now that a single billionaire owns a gaggle of major media outlets, maybe the rest of us should opt out and amplify these alternatives instead. https://www.goodnewsnetwork.org/
Poštovani g.dine David, zahvaljujem na ovoj Vašoj objavi. Verovao sam da ću od Vas dobiti vredne preporuke, da ćete pisati o oblasti finansija baš u smeru koji je meni potreban. Divna konstrukcija teksta i preporučene finansijske organizacije. 😃🤗😁😉
Your whole family is kind people,it's in your genetics. I had a friend,we've gone different ways,who used to say,"the best thing I can do for the poor is not become one of them" by which she meant not add extra pressure to the limited resources. I agree with her even though by some computations I am poor,in money terms,but I think there are worse ways to be poor. I'm reading this at the flowery edge of a planted field deep in rural Wiltshire with bird song all around. I've just been to see a Historic place called Maud Heaths Causeway. It was brilliant. I'm going to do a Substack about it. I now just have to walk a couple of miles back to the outskirts of Chippenham and get a bus into town,then on to Bath,etc.
Is there a petition I can sign with your kids to get you to watch Ted Lasso?? Because now you’ve gotten me to care about you, and it makes me sad that a person I care about is missing out on one of the top five greatest shows of all time (with a revival season coming out soon, to boot!).
Btw, unwavering optimism is only part of Ted’s makeup. Spoiler alert: the way the show depicts his fears, self-doubts, and anxiety in the face of his outward optimism is humanizingly genius.
Avoid Ted Lasso at all costs! The first season is great, and then the show becomes a twisted, toxic parody of what it presented itself as that leaves the discerning viewer feeling baffled and betrayed. Unbelievably preachy, manipulative, and emotionally dishonest.
That would be like if I had stopped watching Friday Night Lights after season one because it became too Christian. The modern reflex to decode art for its meaning is a kind of violence against the work, that it replaces the thing itself with a tidy paraphrase of what it's "really about."
Much affection and respect for you, my nearly Summer Friend, but are you suggesting the third season that I skipped suddenly reintroduced believable dialogue and narrative credibility? Season 2 left me insultedly rolling my eyes, as a Midwesterner.
Just can’t stand that character. I made through the Xmas episode in I think it was S2, which is the cringiest half hour of TV I’ve ever seen. Then I was done with it.
yes. and, where attention goes, energy flows. collectively there is a pull to attend to less than optimal news because we think being aware of bad things helps us survive. but that is only if we use the bad as the starting point of the gps and position ourselves in the direction we choose. also, we can choose from many starting points in our own gps system. many things are true. we validate and grow what we notice. and there are many things to notice. ask the trees and birds what their news is today. what about the ever present babies? do they know the news of the North East West and South (news)?
here is a poem that found me when I was 19. it was in an old book in a bar I was too young to be in, but important ideas have a life of their own. (by the way, substack really messes with format, even after I re-edited the poem to appear properly. so sad. but alas…. I will add separation of stanzas for proper flow)
~~~
Tis The Set Of The Sail -- Or -- One Ship Sails East
There’s a book by the Rebbe I highly recommend. It’s called Positivity Bias. It’s not at all about toxic positivity but how you might phrase a sentence. Shabbat Shalom.
Great David, I just saw Disclosure Day by Steven Spielberg last night. And one of the prevailing themes was the power of empathy where alien possessed humans looked at other people in the eye and had the ability to sympathize and empathize with their feelings and thoughts. Spielberg created a story where that power was transformative for all the individuals involved. His point, as the story developed, was that empathy and true contact and caring about other people has a powerful effect- (whether there is any financial advantage to the interaction at all.)
Your article points out a wonderful charity that through non-interest loans to people who not only get out of a jam but also it shows them that other people care about them enough to help them get through it! - an empathy that must also have an addition curative emotional effect as their temporary desperation is cured. It can also be seen as a beautiful loving exchange. As always, thanks for pointing that out.
Thanks Jonathan. It's true that caring for people has a multiplier effect on empathy. Looking forward to seeing the movie. And credit to you for all the caring and multiplicative empathy Wings creates.
Thank you for David Foster Wallace—both his insight and your commentary. And thanks as well for the good news about what charitable donations can accomplish.
1) Have you ever seen the TV Show << The Middle >>? It's on Netflix. Its very entertaining, but also, there is one character (Sue Heck, the daughter) who is irrepressibly positive. A very nice character.
2) I vividly recall a buddy of mine (who became very successful within the Amway system) in the early 1990s calling << the news >> the << bad news >> and I thought he was on to something. I haven't watched the news in years, and especially in Canada today (where ALL of the MSM is government funded - yes, believe it or not) its all propaganda.
3) Go camping for a few weeks and take a book. Get rid of all electronics. I do this at least once a year.
Thanks for this awesome post. With all the bad news on all the time it is difficult to appreciate there are still really compassionate people and organizations helping others. I always think negativity is generally considered an easier sell than positivity. But negativity is often too strongly focused on a singular material form of greed whereas positivity is focused on the spiritual and is always seen as lacking in one way or another. Compassion never occurs when it can't be seen by those too materialistic or too focused on big money only ever for their own benefit. As you write, negativity is never the whole story. One must look around for stories like yours about caring people and organizations. Thanks again.
I think about This Is Water often. It sometimes feels like we’re living through a time that prioritizes self-expression over self-awareness, where people feel entitled to voice every irritation or grievance without first thinking critically and examining their own perspective, assumptions, or privilege, and how their reactions affect those around them. For me, it’s a reminder to pay attention, to resist the pull of self-centred thinking, and to move through the world with a little more humility, grace, and empathy.
Thanks Sophie. I think This Is Water is a phenomenal speech/piece of writing. As DFW says, it's really hard to escape your own self but worth the effort.
This piece took an unexpected, but lovely, turn. I love the idea that the money gets recycled … the more you help people, the more people receive help. Found the Los Angeles chapter and I’m adding it to our charity list. I need to check but I think my wife’s employer will match our gift. Winning all around, David. Thank you!
Thank you for sharing this story. Especially the second half, about HFLS helping people in financial need in a way that it must bring such huge relief and does not get them into further debt and worries because of the extra interest to be paid as per other loan systems. It is so cool to think that exists there in this day and age and I admire that a lot.
I remember 50 years ago in the UK, when we took out our first mortgage on an apartment for literally only £6,250.00, we had to have a guarantor then too. Mainly because we were still young I guess, and even though my income was more than Graham's at the time, it was hardly considered at all back then and luckily we had saved a good deposit. But owing the building society 'and' his father the money, felt so much more of a commitment.
In regard to News and SM use etc, it is hard to avoid but it really is a true psychological downer. Fortunately I have been able to switch it off for about 3 years now and have no notifications at all set on my phone or desktops, and can't tell you the difference it has made to my mindset. I felt I had to get that sorted out first without other unnecessary negative noise. So I don't miss it and only use my mobile for friends, family contact, podcasts I can learn from and audio books that enlighten me and sometimes read Substack at night. I know if anything really serious happened in World News then Graham would tell me as he listens to BBC World Service all night via ear phones. He sometimes mention things in the morning but knows now that he gets no real conversation about it, especially if it is too negative, usually untrue, and we cannot affect any real change. :)
Sally, negative, untrue, and not subject to real change forms an unfortunately large intersection in a Venn diagram of the "news."
So much more useful to read a book or watch a movie. I started today a book that I may also come close to finishing today: "Look What You Made Me Do" by John Lanchester. Very entertaining.
I love the guarantor model and your personal experience speaks to the positive effect it has.
In-vitro qualifies for interest free loan? When other people go into medical debt for severe injuries this is what qualifies for a loan? You lost me there for good. Having a baby is a choice not a necessity in life.. get a grip David and go see the real world.. spend a week with disabled vets in the poconos where most young people are on drugs and can not afford care or food…
Good thing it’s not an either-or. Generosity takes many forms, as does suffering.
Each organization that does good has its own set of mission priorities. The surest way of ruining any organization is trying to be all things to all people.
The in vitro loan did not deprive disabled army vets in the Poconos of anything. And the loan was repaid to help another borrower with another need. People who can’t afford in vitro is definitely part of ”the real world.”
You have no way of knowing that. Stay in your NYC bubble.
I have the strong feeling (based on David's piece and a quick look at their website) HFLS would extend - and has extended - interest free loans to those in need of help with a serious emergent medical expense, as well as a family in need of support for IVF.
I am on the Board of Hebrew Free Loan in San Diego and our single donation to the organization has been recycled almost 200% helping students complete all levels of education, fertility, emergency medical and rent support - in these times it gives a hand up and not a hand out! Borrowers also receive a financial advisor to provide future stability. The NY org has provided millions of dollars of support - and in the fertility arena, we helped a same sex couple who experienced bias when trying to secure financial assistance. Agree - it is a source of positivity in the dark clouds of our world…
Hi Kay! Thanks for reading and commenting.
Great story, David. It’s no secret that the news skews to the negative, feeding our primitive brain’s appetite for danger and fear. I have long believed that if we heard in equal measure about all the good things going on, a tipping point toward positive change would happen sooner (and toss in evolution to higher consciousness while we’re at it). I met a woman years ago who started a site called the Good News Network (GNN). 20 years on, she’s still at it. Now that a single billionaire owns a gaggle of major media outlets, maybe the rest of us should opt out and amplify these alternatives instead. https://www.goodnewsnetwork.org/
i love GNN. YES! we get to amplify what we wish to grow in the world.
Thanks Julie for the comment and the suggestion of GNN.
I am bookmarking this now!! Thank you.
Poštovani g.dine David, zahvaljujem na ovoj Vašoj objavi. Verovao sam da ću od Vas dobiti vredne preporuke, da ćete pisati o oblasti finansija baš u smeru koji je meni potreban. Divna konstrukcija teksta i preporučene finansijske organizacije. 😃🤗😁😉
Your whole family is kind people,it's in your genetics. I had a friend,we've gone different ways,who used to say,"the best thing I can do for the poor is not become one of them" by which she meant not add extra pressure to the limited resources. I agree with her even though by some computations I am poor,in money terms,but I think there are worse ways to be poor. I'm reading this at the flowery edge of a planted field deep in rural Wiltshire with bird song all around. I've just been to see a Historic place called Maud Heaths Causeway. It was brilliant. I'm going to do a Substack about it. I now just have to walk a couple of miles back to the outskirts of Chippenham and get a bus into town,then on to Bath,etc.
Wiltshire! I've been once. It's the real deal of natural beauty. Thanks for the comment Jane/
Is there a petition I can sign with your kids to get you to watch Ted Lasso?? Because now you’ve gotten me to care about you, and it makes me sad that a person I care about is missing out on one of the top five greatest shows of all time (with a revival season coming out soon, to boot!).
Btw, unwavering optimism is only part of Ted’s makeup. Spoiler alert: the way the show depicts his fears, self-doubts, and anxiety in the face of his outward optimism is humanizingly genius.
It is a great show. My husband and I have binge-watched it twice. Comfort food for the soul without being preachy.
Perfect description 💯
Amy, I think you just did (sign the petition). Noted! And thanks!
I’ll await your report back 🤓
Avoid Ted Lasso at all costs! The first season is great, and then the show becomes a twisted, toxic parody of what it presented itself as that leaves the discerning viewer feeling baffled and betrayed. Unbelievably preachy, manipulative, and emotionally dishonest.
Ted provoking controversy!
Exactly my experience - I binged the first season and was about 2/3 through the second when I just turned it off. No notes on your note above.
That would be like if I had stopped watching Friday Night Lights after season one because it became too Christian. The modern reflex to decode art for its meaning is a kind of violence against the work, that it replaces the thing itself with a tidy paraphrase of what it's "really about."
I loved Friday Night Lights, every season.
So did I. But that’s because I didn’t treat its pedantic depictions of Christianity and religion as advocacy. I found it entertaining. As fiction.
Much affection and respect for you, my nearly Summer Friend, but are you suggesting the third season that I skipped suddenly reintroduced believable dialogue and narrative credibility? Season 2 left me insultedly rolling my eyes, as a Midwesterner.
Fair, it never broke the spell for me the way it did for you.
Season 3 was a disaster.
I found Ted Lasso unwatchable, so don’t feel there’s something wrong with you if you can’t get through two episodes — and I’m a Premier League fan.
Even the first season? Ivy, above, liked it and he's a tough critic.
Just can’t stand that character. I made through the Xmas episode in I think it was S2, which is the cringiest half hour of TV I’ve ever seen. Then I was done with it.
yes. and, where attention goes, energy flows. collectively there is a pull to attend to less than optimal news because we think being aware of bad things helps us survive. but that is only if we use the bad as the starting point of the gps and position ourselves in the direction we choose. also, we can choose from many starting points in our own gps system. many things are true. we validate and grow what we notice. and there are many things to notice. ask the trees and birds what their news is today. what about the ever present babies? do they know the news of the North East West and South (news)?
here is a poem that found me when I was 19. it was in an old book in a bar I was too young to be in, but important ideas have a life of their own. (by the way, substack really messes with format, even after I re-edited the poem to appear properly. so sad. but alas…. I will add separation of stanzas for proper flow)
~~~
Tis The Set Of The Sail -- Or -- One Ship Sails East
by Ella Wheeler Wilcox
~
But to every mind there openeth,
A way, and way, and away,
A high soul climbs the highway,
And the low soul gropes the low,
And in between on the misty flats,
The rest drift to and fro.
~
But to every man there openeth,
A high way and a low,
And every mind decideth,
The way his soul shall go.
~
One ship sails East,
And another West,
By the self-same winds that blow,
'Tis the set of the sails
And not the gales,
That tells the way we go.
~
Like the winds of the sea
Are the waves of time,
As we journey along through life,
'Tis the set of the soul,
That determines the goal,
And not the calm or the strife.
Those organizations sound wonderful.
There’s a book by the Rebbe I highly recommend. It’s called Positivity Bias. It’s not at all about toxic positivity but how you might phrase a sentence. Shabbat Shalom.
Thanks Carissa. Shabbat Shalom to you as well.
Great David, I just saw Disclosure Day by Steven Spielberg last night. And one of the prevailing themes was the power of empathy where alien possessed humans looked at other people in the eye and had the ability to sympathize and empathize with their feelings and thoughts. Spielberg created a story where that power was transformative for all the individuals involved. His point, as the story developed, was that empathy and true contact and caring about other people has a powerful effect- (whether there is any financial advantage to the interaction at all.)
Your article points out a wonderful charity that through non-interest loans to people who not only get out of a jam but also it shows them that other people care about them enough to help them get through it! - an empathy that must also have an addition curative emotional effect as their temporary desperation is cured. It can also be seen as a beautiful loving exchange. As always, thanks for pointing that out.
Thanks Jonathan. It's true that caring for people has a multiplier effect on empathy. Looking forward to seeing the movie. And credit to you for all the caring and multiplicative empathy Wings creates.
Thank you for David Foster Wallace—both his insight and your commentary. And thanks as well for the good news about what charitable donations can accomplish.
Thanks Rona. This Is Water may be what DFW is best remembered for, which is not at all a negative thing! It's a brilliant speech.
I love hearing about groups doing such good work, so thank you for sharing that.
My mom used to say, "Most of us are are good people living good lives, that's why they call it news."
Jennifer I love this!
Thanks Jennifer. Your Mom put it very well and concisely.
Very nice. A few points:
1) Have you ever seen the TV Show << The Middle >>? It's on Netflix. Its very entertaining, but also, there is one character (Sue Heck, the daughter) who is irrepressibly positive. A very nice character.
2) I vividly recall a buddy of mine (who became very successful within the Amway system) in the early 1990s calling << the news >> the << bad news >> and I thought he was on to something. I haven't watched the news in years, and especially in Canada today (where ALL of the MSM is government funded - yes, believe it or not) its all propaganda.
3) Go camping for a few weeks and take a book. Get rid of all electronics. I do this at least once a year.
Camping terrifies me. But I should do my own detox. Thanks for the comment and the recommendations.
Car camping is easy. Buy a tent and go to a state park with good facilities.
Thanks for this awesome post. With all the bad news on all the time it is difficult to appreciate there are still really compassionate people and organizations helping others. I always think negativity is generally considered an easier sell than positivity. But negativity is often too strongly focused on a singular material form of greed whereas positivity is focused on the spiritual and is always seen as lacking in one way or another. Compassion never occurs when it can't be seen by those too materialistic or too focused on big money only ever for their own benefit. As you write, negativity is never the whole story. One must look around for stories like yours about caring people and organizations. Thanks again.
Larry, your comments are always a positive pleasure to read.
I think about This Is Water often. It sometimes feels like we’re living through a time that prioritizes self-expression over self-awareness, where people feel entitled to voice every irritation or grievance without first thinking critically and examining their own perspective, assumptions, or privilege, and how their reactions affect those around them. For me, it’s a reminder to pay attention, to resist the pull of self-centred thinking, and to move through the world with a little more humility, grace, and empathy.
Thanks Sophie. I think This Is Water is a phenomenal speech/piece of writing. As DFW says, it's really hard to escape your own self but worth the effort.
This piece took an unexpected, but lovely, turn. I love the idea that the money gets recycled … the more you help people, the more people receive help. Found the Los Angeles chapter and I’m adding it to our charity list. I need to check but I think my wife’s employer will match our gift. Winning all around, David. Thank you!
Thanks Michael. That's great about the LA chapter. It really is a win-win.
Thank you for sharing this story. Especially the second half, about HFLS helping people in financial need in a way that it must bring such huge relief and does not get them into further debt and worries because of the extra interest to be paid as per other loan systems. It is so cool to think that exists there in this day and age and I admire that a lot.
I remember 50 years ago in the UK, when we took out our first mortgage on an apartment for literally only £6,250.00, we had to have a guarantor then too. Mainly because we were still young I guess, and even though my income was more than Graham's at the time, it was hardly considered at all back then and luckily we had saved a good deposit. But owing the building society 'and' his father the money, felt so much more of a commitment.
In regard to News and SM use etc, it is hard to avoid but it really is a true psychological downer. Fortunately I have been able to switch it off for about 3 years now and have no notifications at all set on my phone or desktops, and can't tell you the difference it has made to my mindset. I felt I had to get that sorted out first without other unnecessary negative noise. So I don't miss it and only use my mobile for friends, family contact, podcasts I can learn from and audio books that enlighten me and sometimes read Substack at night. I know if anything really serious happened in World News then Graham would tell me as he listens to BBC World Service all night via ear phones. He sometimes mention things in the morning but knows now that he gets no real conversation about it, especially if it is too negative, usually untrue, and we cannot affect any real change. :)
Sally, negative, untrue, and not subject to real change forms an unfortunately large intersection in a Venn diagram of the "news."
So much more useful to read a book or watch a movie. I started today a book that I may also come close to finishing today: "Look What You Made Me Do" by John Lanchester. Very entertaining.
I love the guarantor model and your personal experience speaks to the positive effect it has.