Twenty five years ago I was defrauded by a woman I’ll refer to as “Nan.” Nan dealt in an esoteric, quasi-financial asset class that was traded in a highly illiquid market that she helped to create.
I've realized in myself that the amount of worrying in my "portfolio" has little to do with objective conditions. Through fairly dramatic changes in fortune and various periods of calm and chaos, the amount stays pretty level.
I've also regulated it with alcohol, but that only affects the timing of peaks and troughs, not the total level.
As I've gotten older and also dabbled in meditation, I can tamp the total level down some, but "allocation" is irrelevant. (I've lain awake at night worrying over some absolutely stupid shit).
Good essay, but it does leave me curious about the scam.
Perhaps the total amount of our worry portfolio does stay the same, but undoubtedly some worries affect us more than others. For example, there's a category of what I'd call "simulated" worry. An example is rooting for a favorite sports team in a tense and all important game. And perhaps the opposite is when we have a vague sense of worry, but can't quite figure out why we have that sensation.
It is worth remembering that we, most of us in the US, lead privileged lives. I'm not, of course, including the millions living in poverty or in areas where they cannot get reasonable health care. For the rest of us, when we think of the rest of the world, we are, indeed privileged. How far up on the privilege ladder one stands can vary, but with all we have, both materially and emotionally, it is good for us to remember that our worries are not as big as they seem. There are reasons so many clamor, endure hardships and take huge risks to come here. Worried because supply interruptions made you wait for your new car? Worried about the choice between vacation A vs vacation B? Worried that your child might not get in to Harvard and might have to settle for Duke? and on and on. It's always good to have some perspective, to recall when facing a layoff that your family is well, etc, etc.
Love the perspective on worries.
I appreciate you sharing this information and reminding us all that worry and how much power we give to it, is detrimental to our health.
I've realized in myself that the amount of worrying in my "portfolio" has little to do with objective conditions. Through fairly dramatic changes in fortune and various periods of calm and chaos, the amount stays pretty level.
I've also regulated it with alcohol, but that only affects the timing of peaks and troughs, not the total level.
As I've gotten older and also dabbled in meditation, I can tamp the total level down some, but "allocation" is irrelevant. (I've lain awake at night worrying over some absolutely stupid shit).
Good essay, but it does leave me curious about the scam.
Thanks for this comment. Made me think.
Perhaps the total amount of our worry portfolio does stay the same, but undoubtedly some worries affect us more than others. For example, there's a category of what I'd call "simulated" worry. An example is rooting for a favorite sports team in a tense and all important game. And perhaps the opposite is when we have a vague sense of worry, but can't quite figure out why we have that sensation.
It is worth remembering that we, most of us in the US, lead privileged lives. I'm not, of course, including the millions living in poverty or in areas where they cannot get reasonable health care. For the rest of us, when we think of the rest of the world, we are, indeed privileged. How far up on the privilege ladder one stands can vary, but with all we have, both materially and emotionally, it is good for us to remember that our worries are not as big as they seem. There are reasons so many clamor, endure hardships and take huge risks to come here. Worried because supply interruptions made you wait for your new car? Worried about the choice between vacation A vs vacation B? Worried that your child might not get in to Harvard and might have to settle for Duke? and on and on. It's always good to have some perspective, to recall when facing a layoff that your family is well, etc, etc.
Agree. And it helps me remember to read what you wrote.