You’re helping me anticipate my 62nd birthday exactly one month from now! (And, I met my husband in 1984. We still have our early correspondence, but it’s boxed up in the attic. And, he rarely reads anything I write.) But back to the subject—about 6 years ago I started interviewing people to discuss their “later vocations.” The phrase ended up in my book that came out in 2022–all about 19th-century women finding new callings after mid-life. The contemporary interviews never went beyond two blog posts. I had too much going on back then to take it further. Of course, with both projects I was working through my own desires to open new paths…. I am still working on that! I am definitely not dreading my birthday!
Thank you, David! The book is an academic one, footnotes & all: Engaging Italy: American Women's Utopian Visions and Transnational Networks (SUNY P -- running a 30% off sale this month!). The "utopian visions" phrase emphasizes the way these women followed new dreams at mid-life. Your writing is making me want to dig back into the interviews with contemporary friends (men and women) who impress me with their abilities to follow new open doors or make new paths for themselves. Keep it up!
I am so interested in how women find new directions after some sort of big transition like divorce, menopause, the empty nest, or some combination of the above.
Thank you, Gillian! I started a response to you and it somehow got eating in cyberspace! Anyway, You can see from my comment to David more about my book (and also here: https://sunypress.edu/Books/E/Engaging-Italy) . But you might really like @Anneboydrioux 's substack -- was Letters from Anne but is now Audacious Women, Creative Lives.
Thanks for the recommendation! I had asked your book's title, but when I saw your reply to David, I thought perhaps I just hadn't seen it and deleted my comment. Then I realized you had only just replied to him, so I left a new comment! That's probably what happened to your response to me--it vanished when I deleted my question about the book. In any case, thank you!
Simply beautiful - and oh so vulnerable and true. Bravo for having the courage to question youthful expectations of how to show up in the world and discovering you have so much more to give and do. Your birthday gift of realization and joy is actually a gift to the world!
-- Firstly, happy, happy birthday, David. I always believed that there’s an exquisite power in being alive in one’s sixties. I wonder if it feels that different from my current 32. And yes, there’s time too – that entity or energy that never ceases to leave its message, whether we are ready or not. Great essay. Xo.
Thaissa, thanks for the comment. When i read many of the Substack essays of people in their 30s, like you, I marvel at how advanced you all are in your self-awareness and questioning compared to my memory of being that age. I really think it's the writing.
I have that same experience....liking to think I was as self aware as they seem to be.....but in reality I was pretty clueless. BTW if you think 62 was a trip, wait till you get to....uh.....64.
I’ve fallen into the trap of believing that in order to practice my love of writing, it has to be tied to something else I love, and choose to write about. This gave me hope that, just maybe, writing can be enough.
Appreciated this post a great deal.
And after reading your card, I’ve realized there’s much more room for creative writing in the cards I send to my loved ones. That was beautiful.
I share your gratitude for another year. I can think of many friends and family members who never made it to whatever age I happen to be. I'm glad for each year, and I do my best to make the most of it.
Happy birthday, David. I wish you many years to love those dear to you while pursuing this consumingly odd and (to me, anyway) intermittingly thrilling vocation. Writing doesn’t make a lot of sense to those who are not writers. The tangible rewards are elusive and few. Yet when you know you’ve said what you didn’t even know you meant, and in the saying made a difference to even one reader, writing is flying. Does a tax lawyer know this feeling? Or a dentist? Later life is the best time to write. You have more to say than you imagined possible when younger, and no expectations to be a wunderkind.
Thanks Rona. I agree with that perspective. Although I have been surprised at how many young writers on Substack seem to be precocious in their self-awareness. Which I think is due to the fact that they write.
As a long time journal writer ( since I am 13) I only recently came to understand why I am doing it. I first did it because I wanted to document my life, so I’ll remember it later. But turns out the information I wrote down became so irrelevant for the future. (Who cares how cool Kim Wilde is now!) the slow speed of handwriting is just there to help me slow down to think. It almost doesn’t matter what I write. Because I have no audience. : )
David - You were one of the first writers I subscribed to when I joined Substack. Reading your words over the past four months and watching you find your voice and passion in this place has been a blessing. You were also one of my very first paid subscribers, and that act of kindness on your part did so much to encourage me to continue writing when I felt so out of place. I am delighted you are here, sharing your voice and journey with the world. I always look forward to your articles showing up in my inbox. Happy birthday, and I look forward to benefiting from your vocation in the years ahead.
David, HB! I love the card and inscription to your wife and a big THANKS to her for prompting (prodding) you to write. 62 is nice but I have to say that 72 (where I am now) is even better in terms of self awareness. Even if the reflection in the mirror is a bit less appealing. Excited to be writing with you and grateful for your support.
Happy birthday, David. This line stood out powerfully to me - so succinct, matter of fact, and full of awareness: “I realized I had needlessly enslaved myself to the mythologies of my youth.” I’m glad to be part of your Substack community. Adding a little breath of gratitude to your pile of birthday wishes.
Thanks!
Thanks Isabel.
Happy birthday!
Happy Birthday! That looks like a Checker cab? Have you ever watched “Best Years of Our Lives”? Love your writing.
You’re helping me anticipate my 62nd birthday exactly one month from now! (And, I met my husband in 1984. We still have our early correspondence, but it’s boxed up in the attic. And, he rarely reads anything I write.) But back to the subject—about 6 years ago I started interviewing people to discuss their “later vocations.” The phrase ended up in my book that came out in 2022–all about 19th-century women finding new callings after mid-life. The contemporary interviews never went beyond two blog posts. I had too much going on back then to take it further. Of course, with both projects I was working through my own desires to open new paths…. I am still working on that! I am definitely not dreading my birthday!
Thanks for the comment, Etta. What's the name of your book?
And early Happy Birthday!
Thank you, David! The book is an academic one, footnotes & all: Engaging Italy: American Women's Utopian Visions and Transnational Networks (SUNY P -- running a 30% off sale this month!). The "utopian visions" phrase emphasizes the way these women followed new dreams at mid-life. Your writing is making me want to dig back into the interviews with contemporary friends (men and women) who impress me with their abilities to follow new open doors or make new paths for themselves. Keep it up!
I am so interested in how women find new directions after some sort of big transition like divorce, menopause, the empty nest, or some combination of the above.
Thank you, Gillian! I started a response to you and it somehow got eating in cyberspace! Anyway, You can see from my comment to David more about my book (and also here: https://sunypress.edu/Books/E/Engaging-Italy) . But you might really like @Anneboydrioux 's substack -- was Letters from Anne but is now Audacious Women, Creative Lives.
Thanks for the recommendation! I had asked your book's title, but when I saw your reply to David, I thought perhaps I just hadn't seen it and deleted my comment. Then I realized you had only just replied to him, so I left a new comment! That's probably what happened to your response to me--it vanished when I deleted my question about the book. In any case, thank you!
Happy Birthday David!
Simply beautiful - and oh so vulnerable and true. Bravo for having the courage to question youthful expectations of how to show up in the world and discovering you have so much more to give and do. Your birthday gift of realization and joy is actually a gift to the world!
Thanks Laura!
-- Firstly, happy, happy birthday, David. I always believed that there’s an exquisite power in being alive in one’s sixties. I wonder if it feels that different from my current 32. And yes, there’s time too – that entity or energy that never ceases to leave its message, whether we are ready or not. Great essay. Xo.
Thaissa, thanks for the comment. When i read many of the Substack essays of people in their 30s, like you, I marvel at how advanced you all are in your self-awareness and questioning compared to my memory of being that age. I really think it's the writing.
I have that same experience....liking to think I was as self aware as they seem to be.....but in reality I was pretty clueless. BTW if you think 62 was a trip, wait till you get to....uh.....64.
I’ve fallen into the trap of believing that in order to practice my love of writing, it has to be tied to something else I love, and choose to write about. This gave me hope that, just maybe, writing can be enough.
Appreciated this post a great deal.
And after reading your card, I’ve realized there’s much more room for creative writing in the cards I send to my loved ones. That was beautiful.
Thanks David.
Happy Birthday! I greet my birthdays with neither great joy nor great dread. I'm thankful for another alive in this essentially beautiful world.
I share your gratitude for another year. I can think of many friends and family members who never made it to whatever age I happen to be. I'm glad for each year, and I do my best to make the most of it.
Same. In fact I thank G-d every morning when I wake up. 🥰🙏
Happy Birthday! I gave you a tennis win as your gift! ;)
I love the taxi card, so sweet.
Sounds like a challenge for a rematch!
Happy birthday, David. I wish you many years to love those dear to you while pursuing this consumingly odd and (to me, anyway) intermittingly thrilling vocation. Writing doesn’t make a lot of sense to those who are not writers. The tangible rewards are elusive and few. Yet when you know you’ve said what you didn’t even know you meant, and in the saying made a difference to even one reader, writing is flying. Does a tax lawyer know this feeling? Or a dentist? Later life is the best time to write. You have more to say than you imagined possible when younger, and no expectations to be a wunderkind.
Thanks Rona. I agree with that perspective. Although I have been surprised at how many young writers on Substack seem to be precocious in their self-awareness. Which I think is due to the fact that they write.
Happy belated birthday. I love this article.
As a long time journal writer ( since I am 13) I only recently came to understand why I am doing it. I first did it because I wanted to document my life, so I’ll remember it later. But turns out the information I wrote down became so irrelevant for the future. (Who cares how cool Kim Wilde is now!) the slow speed of handwriting is just there to help me slow down to think. It almost doesn’t matter what I write. Because I have no audience. : )
Thanks Maria. I suspect you recognize the book from which the taxi picture was taken!
Of course! : )
David - You were one of the first writers I subscribed to when I joined Substack. Reading your words over the past four months and watching you find your voice and passion in this place has been a blessing. You were also one of my very first paid subscribers, and that act of kindness on your part did so much to encourage me to continue writing when I felt so out of place. I am delighted you are here, sharing your voice and journey with the world. I always look forward to your articles showing up in my inbox. Happy birthday, and I look forward to benefiting from your vocation in the years ahead.
Thanks Matthew and I am equally happy to be part of your community and to be able to enjoy your writing.
David, HB! I love the card and inscription to your wife and a big THANKS to her for prompting (prodding) you to write. 62 is nice but I have to say that 72 (where I am now) is even better in terms of self awareness. Even if the reflection in the mirror is a bit less appealing. Excited to be writing with you and grateful for your support.
Thanks Debbie and looking forward to learning more from you about 72.
you might enjoy this one (for paid subs only) https://debbieweil.substack.com/p/the-complicated-vigil-for-my-declining
And if I dare to say so, 82 is even better!
maybe there’s a -2’s club
Yup.
Happy birthday, David. This line stood out powerfully to me - so succinct, matter of fact, and full of awareness: “I realized I had needlessly enslaved myself to the mythologies of my youth.” I’m glad to be part of your Substack community. Adding a little breath of gratitude to your pile of birthday wishes.
Thanks Tara.