Expectant Grandfather, Actual Grandfather

In August, I wrote a post about being an expectant grandfather. Now that our daughter delivered our grandson Max on November 9th, I wanted to do a quick followup post.

As the due date approached and then arrived, my stress level increased. My sole focus was on a healthy outcome (not for me as I nervously consumed un unmentionable number of Mallomars).

Once the health hurdle was cleared, I was able to have a very quick visit with Max and his parents a few hours after his birth. Like anything new and elemental, seeing a baby cuddling with my daughter seemed surreal. My mind did after all turn to mush and all I could do was smile. Unlike Max’s parents, I had no task to perform, no arrangements to make. My only role was to smile and be happy.

While happiness remains, I have had a chance to think about what a new generation means to me. I have a sense of the baton being passed, and the center of familial gravity shifting. I don’t feel superannuated; instead I feel a surprising sense of greater freedom. My daughter and son-in-law are in control of the next generation, and with control comes responsibility.

I have heard grandparents talk about a greater desire to make the world a better place for their grandchildren. Specifically, focusing their time and efforts on whatever risks they perceive as existential far into the future.

I don’t feel that way. If anything, with the arrival of Max, another person to love and thus to worry about, the aperture of my worldview has narrowed. I’m more focused on the here and now. I’m less interested in what might happen globally decades from now and more interested in what might happen in the next twelve months to the United States. And I’m more inspired to work on what I can do to affect that immediate future, close to home.

Finally, I’m filled with gratitude to my daughter and son-in-law for creating Max. They’ve given our family another person to love. An inestimable gift.

At the bottom is a link to my August Expectant Grandparent post.

But, before that, with his parents’ permission, a picture of Max coming home from the hospital yesterday evening.

Unfiltered Thoughts of an Expectant Grandfather plus the Grandparent "Cult"